Strictly the Raw Prawn

On April 27, 2010, in Strictly Editorial, by admin
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Face to Face
Creative Commons License photo credit: Grantsviews

When we had kids, we came to an arrangement.  I would do all the poo and vomit and he would do the teeth and nails, because I’m totally squeamish about teeth and nails.  I know, I don’t understand it either, but there you are.

So now I’m on my own, I get the full joy of pulling out those wobbly bleeding teeth of my now ten year old, who thankfully doesn’t have many of them left, but I’ve dealt with the last five years worth of them.  Also the cutting of the toe nails which I can never do right and almost always ends in tears, both of ours.  The ten year old for nearly losing his toes, and me for causing him so much pain and anguish and for being the one who has to do it even though we had a deal.

Last night I made myself some prawns.  I saw a really quick nice recipe on Everyday Italian and decided to try it.  I totally forgot about the preparation that goes into prawns when I bought six green prawns from the fishmonger.   When I unwrapped the package I was face to face, literally, with six green bug eyed prawns that I would now have to de-head, de-vein and then cook.  OMG another deal breaker I had forgotten all about.  Whenever we had prawns together, he would always de-head and de-vein them and I would cook them.  No wonder I haven’t made them myself for so long.  Funny the things you forget I guess.

Anyway I so didn’t want to eat the bloody prawns after I succesfully de-headed them and cleaned their tracts.  I also washed them for good measure, because I don’t know if you’ve ever eaten a bad prawn, but I have, and I choose death over eating another one.  So I am super careful and very suspect about every single prawn.

I ate five of the six once I’d grilled them and sauced them with pesto and lemon.  They were delicious I guess but they

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Strictly Solo

On April 22, 2010, in Strictly Emotional, Strictly Parenting, by admin
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Once you get married, it guarantees you a partner in life.  There’s always going to be someone there to scratch your back, pick you up when you fall over, encourage you through those hard times.

When your partner dies unexpectedly however, this changes everything.  Everything you thought about life, love and marriage has finished and you have to calve out a new life for yourself and your children.

When you have children, the burdens of your life have just doubled instantly.  It’s up to you alone to raise your children.  Something that you entered into as a partnership, now relies on you sailing solo to complete, and it scares you – a lot.

Whether your partner dies, or you separate through divorce, there is a grieving process that takes place.  You grieve for what you had, what you believed you would have, and what you thought your life, as a family, would be like.

While trying to cope with this grief, you also have the responsibility of caring for your children, immediately.  They don’t tend to wait, nor understand that you are upset over life’s more complex issues.

This means a huge amount of sacrifice on your part, the parent.  You need to put your feelings on the back burner while you make toast, get school lunches ready, sort out the house stuff, get to work and keep your career on track, get the kids to their after school activities – somehow, get home, talk to the kids about their day, get their homework done, (more…)

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Strictly Coping with Grief

On April 19, 2010, in Strictly Emotional, by admin
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When a relationship that has children involved breaks down, there are a lot of processes for everyone to go through.  The children are upset because their life has been turned upside down and they must adjust to sudden change.  However the parent is also suffering from extreme loss, disappointment and heartache.  In this they may also feel scared and worried about how they are going to cope in the future, how they are going to manage financially and also how they are going to manage the children’s emotional needs.

The most important person to take care of first is you, the parent.  If you don’t work, nothing does.  You need to deal with your emotions over the breakdown of your relationship first and foremost and as quickly as possible.  This is not easy to do, even without children, but once children are in the picture, you owe it to them, and yourself as a parent, to (more…)

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